Pregnant and in love

back to the grind.

not.

i can't promise to be back to anything. but i do want to make an effort to blog this pregnancy.

wait, what?

this girl is pregnant. again. if you weren't around the first time, i hate being pregnant. it's exhausting and a lot of hard work and it's even worse when you have a toddler who can't go to most of your appointments with you.

but, here i am.

first, a quicky update on the jackman. still no talking, but i'm over it. he has speech again this week, but he makes so much noise that i'd prefer if he just never talked ;) i can't wait to hear what he has to say about everything, but i can at the same time. he's still 25 lb, but he's grown to 34" tall. every one that sees him comments on how tall he's getting - it's about time. he still loves the bubble guppies and playing with balls, but he's found a new love in climbing stairs and hot wheels cars.

finally - photo proof that he does look like me (sorry kid)

next, hubster and i celebrated our third (!!!!) anniversary this past week, so i thought i'd throw together a little collage of the last 4 february 18ths.

somethings never change, including how much i love this man.

finally - the exciting part. prego facts.

What Fruit are you? brb, have to google it.. ok, baby is the size of a fig. (what the heck is a fig?)

Due date:  september 8, but i will be induced by august 24 (i'd be happy to make it to the middle of july!)

How far along:  11 weeks and 4 days

Next appointment:  february 26

Gender:  unknown

Total weight gain/loss:  i've lost 8 lb since i got the positive! i assume it's because i stopped drinking diet coke..

Exercise: chasing a toddler through the snow and up and down the stairs.

Stretch marks: left over from the first one.

Swelling: nada. but i did have to replace my real wedding ring with a fake one from old navy.

Maternity clothes:  mostly maternity tops. this belly was not hiding from anyone.

Belly button:  no change

Sleep: i could sleep 15 hours a night and still take a 5 hour nap during the day. however, toddlers don't allow that so i'm making due.

Food cravings:  not a lot of anything. last night i needed pizza from burger baron though, so we made it happen.

Symptoms: exhaustion, my boobs hurt, and i can hardly control my bladder.  

Movement:  i'm fairly certain i've felt little bean jumping around a couple of times!

Labor signs: de nada.

What I miss:  diet coke. but not really.

What I'm loving:  sleep.

What I'm looking forward to:  finding out the gender!!

Best moment this week: carter was home - naps.

Blood sugars?: have been most excellent! 

there you have it. baby bean 2.0 is developing inside my womb. woot!

life interrupted.

imagine that.

life gets in the way of recording life.

luckily for social media, i have everything i need at my fingertips. now to compile it into a blog post.

right around the labor day weekend, jack started acting funny. he got fussy and was cranky and started waking up every single night for a couple of hours. turns out he had a cold and ear infection, triggered by his canine teeth coming in. (update - a month and a bit later and we're still waiting for the damn teeth to come in).

the same day he was diagnosed with that i started babysitting ryder, a cute 5 year old who is here every week day from 1130-4, and every other friday from 8-4/5. he really is a good kid, super sweet, and he loves jack.. but he's 5. and it's a challenge for me. my imagination has crashed and burned. luckily he loves colouring and playdoh and "helping" me bake.

i also babysit 3 siblings (2, 4, and 6) on wednesdays (i've actually only had them once) from 10-4. between the 4 kids + jack my hands are full full full.

carter started school and he loooooves it. he's still trying to find a balance between being home and getting homework/studying done. but i think he's doing quite well. his favourite class is ethics, but he also loves gym. criminal law is a lot of work, and english has always been a hard subject for him, but he's gotten 80% or higher on every assignment and test he's had!

the best part of the last month and a half (since i blogged) is that we moved! from an itty bitty house with no floor space to a huge house with a loft and open floor plan. and a dishwasher. love love love the dishwasher.

jack's room is weird, since it was formerly a craft room/office and has a countertop all the way around and no closet, but we're making it work. the former formal living room is now a playroom, complete with play kitchen and tool bench. it's awesome to just throw all the toys in there and close the doors, *voila* clean!

carter and i have the master bedroom with ensuite, and a giant closet. there's seriously too much room haha. the one wall looks so blank and empty, i need to print off a huge family picture to hang up on it.

mom and i are going to refinish and old dresser i got from elizabeth.. it's going to be quite the undertaking since neither of us have ever done it before. i plan on doing a whole series of before/during/after photos. watch for that ;)

oh, and i need mom friends. *sad face*

"I don't want to drive up to the pearly gates in a shiny sports car, wearing beautifully tailored clothes, my hair expertly coiffed, and with long perfectly manicured fingernails. 

I want to drive up in a station wagon that has mud on the wheels from taking the kids to scout camp. I want to be therewith  a smudge of peanut butter on my shirt from making sandwiches for a sick neighbor's children. I want to be there with a little dirt under my fingernails from helping to weed someone's garden. I want to be there with children's sticky kisses on my cheeks and the tears of a friend on my shoulder. 

I want The Lord to know that I was really here and I really lived."

- Marjorie Pay Hinkley

March goals!!

Obviously the first week of March has already come and gone, which is insane, but I'm making some goals for March anyway.

First, update on my February goals. We cloth diaper (almost) full time now! It took some tweaking and learning and a lot of leaks, not to mention a ton of laundry, but I feel like it's an A+! Plus I'm getting something like 15 more diapers at the end of this month, so that'll mean less laundry haha.

And my diabetes is WAY better. :) I used all 100 strips this month! Go me!

So, March. I want to keep up with the diabetes. I want to start a budget. And stick to it. And I want to work out. I want to sweat every day. And I want to start being on my phone less!

Now it's out in the open. Phew. Wish me luck.

Turning the page..

It's time for a new page in the Peterson book!

Carter has been jumping back and forth between applying for either the Edmonton or Lethbridge City Police Force and going to school for a couple of months - actually since before Jack was born! - and finally decided he wants to go to school to up his chances of success in a police force. He (we, the whole family is going to school really) applied for the Criminal Justice - Policing program at the Lethbridge College (which is one of the best Criminal Justice programs like, ever!) just about 2 weeks ago, and this morning at about 5:30 he came into our room and announced that we had mail. Great. Leave it on the couch, I'm sleeping. "No, we got GOOD mail!" Sure enough, he's been accepted to begin in September 2014!

What does this mean?

It means we'll be moving "home" (since I've always referred to Southern Alberta as home, even after living in Edmonton for 2+ years) in August! Give or take a couple of weeks, depending on where we move to.

It means I may end up going back to work part time, and Jack may end up in some kind of daycare!

It means that I really REALLY need to stop shopping and start saving money.

It means that if I want to invest in cloth diapers, which I do, I need to do it NOW so when we're in school, living on a meager student's budget, we won't have to buy diapers!

It means we get to stay home for Christmas and not feel bad about not seeing any family!

It means no more 6+ hour trips to stay for 2 days, then turn around and come back home.

Southern Alberta to me is home. It's family. I could not be more excited about that aspect of it.

Cons? Lethbridge closes down at like 6pm! There's only one movie theater. I have mom friends up here. I love the ward we live in. I love my calling.

All in all, I think we're ready for a change. And this is a big change!

"This is my house, I swear!"

Jack and I are down at my mom's house in Raymond because Carter is going out of town to work. But yesterday Carter texted me after work and said he was having the worst day ever, and that he locked his car and house keys in the car. Oops. He had called the landlord, but he was going to be another 2 hours and I didn't want Carter to be sitting out in the cold (although, luckily, it was only like -9) for that long, so I told him to try the windows (since we don't lock them. Well, now we do). The windows in our basement are tiny. Seriously, tiny. But my logic was that to be a legal suite the windows have to be big enough for someone to crawl out of. The reverse of that would be big enough to crawl into! He tracked through the (literally) 3 feet of snow to our kitchen window, and crouched down beside the window to cut the screen when he heard a helicopter overhead. The adrenaline pumping through his system convinced him that they were the police out to find him! He said he stood flat as a board and "hid" against the house. Once he pulled himself together, he knelt back down and cut the screen. Our kitchen window faces our neighbor's gate, by the way. He said he got all the way to his hips into the window when the neighbor's teenage daughter came out the gate, screamed, then ran to the front of the house. Great. The mom popped her head around the corner, then they ran to the car. Carter jumped out of the window and ran after the screaming pair, told them that this was his house, he locked himself out, and luckily the teenager recognized him from the many times she's come into the backyard to get their balls. The mom had 9-1-1 dialed and was about to push send! lol. When he got into the house he called me and said, "I basically peed my pants like 6 times. I thought the police were going to come arrest me for sure!" Poor Carter. Let's just say he won't do that again! lol

Love!

This guy went and got himself hitched!

His wife is beautiful. Marshall was stunning. It was so much fun!

I've known Marshall for a long time, like since we were 13. So 8 years! Wow. 

And Carol is perfect for Marshall in every way. I love the new Leishman family! Marshall is still and forever will be one of my best friends. 

{We're both very excited to get our 3 other friends back! Ethan is home from the Philippines in October, Adrian is home from South Africa in December, and Viktoria is home from South Korea in February!}

Congratulations to Marshall and Carol! We love you. 

Education

Join this challenge!

I know a lot about high risk pregnancies.

I know a lot about thinking your pregnancy is so healthy and wonderful, even with type 1 diabetes, only to find out that your body is basically rejecting the precious life you're carrying.

I know all about being lied to by doctors about being put on bed rest.

I know about spending 4 days on said bed rest in a hospital staring out at a brick wall, missing fresh air and vitamin D.

I know about feeling your little boy kicking at his heart rate monitor and ultrasound probe in frustration.

I know how being diagnosed with severe preeclampsia feels.

I know how scary it is.

I know how magnesium sulfate feels when it hits your blood stream. How awful it is.

I know how bumpy the ambulance ride to and from the airport is.

I know how small air ambulances are, and how quickly they can travel 1000 km.

I know how dumb you feel when the doctor looks you in the eye and asks if you know what's going on or how sick you are.

I know how it feels to be told you'll be delivering your 28-weeks gestation son by emergency C-section..

I know what a C-section feels like.

I know how hard it is to see your son get whisked away and be left on the operating table, wondering how he is and what's happening.

I know all about having a baby in the NICU (38 days and counting!), and how hard it is to get him to wake up and try breast feeding.

I know how lucky I am to have a healthy son, to be healthy, to have a little family. I know how wonderful extended family is. I know how important a ward family is. I know how frustrating and scary pregnancy can be, especially when it's a high risk.. But I know, above all, how worth it it is. I know how worth it it is to hold your newborn, tiny tiny son for the first time, and to watch him grow, and come to recognize his parents.

I know what love is. Again.

250 Word Challenge

Join this challenge!

1992

Surprise girl.

Last minute name change.

Nicole.

1994

Brother #1. Ryan.

1996

Brother #2. Tyler.

1998

Brother #3. Max.

1999

Sister?

No.

Brother #4. Justin.

2000

Epic millennial sleepover with Kimber.

Baptism.

2002

Young Womens.

February 2003

House fire.

Summer 2003

Sweet family reunion.

New cousins.

Water fight.

New house.

2004

Air band.

Done elementary school.

2005

Junior High.

Kind of first boyfriend.

2006

More boys.

Fake boyfriend.

New best friends.

2007

Facebook.

First real boyfriend.

First kiss with second boyfriend.

High School Musical to infinity and beyond.

RHS.

2008

Diabetes.

Europe.

Spokane (train).

California.

Best friend becomes boyfriend.

Boyfriend ends.

Still best friends.

2009

Hawaii.

Stake New Years Eve dance = met my amazing hubby.

Seniors.

2010

First missionary friend.

Hawaii again.

Graduation.

Last boyfriend forever.

Michael Buble concert. Fan-freaking-tastic.

Nanny.

2011

Fired for the first time.

Moved to Edmonton.

NAIT.

New friends.

Engaged.

More missionary friends.

First place by myself.

2012

Temple.

Married to my wonderful love.

Name change.

Graduation again.

BFF.

Moved.

Real life job.

Big Valley Jamboree. Rascal Flatts forever.

20 years old. WHAT!

BFF baptism.

Fancy new car.

Debt.

Being Carter’s caretaker.

Broken fancy new car.

Pregnant!

2013

Moved.

One year anniversary.

Fixed fancy new car.

Getting bigger. And bigger.

Swollen. Swelling. Puffy.

High blood pressure.

Hospital.

Severe preeclampsia.

Airplane ride.

Out of time.

Emergency C-section.

Jack Cameron. Two pounds, nine ounces. My perfect little boy.

Neonatal Intensive Care Unit.

Thirty seven days and counting.

Frustration and tears and love.

So much love.

Family.

how to tell you're becoming significantly lacking in household chores..

i went to dish up some leftover casserole for lunch today. i grabbed a paper plate - the smartest investment i've ever made in my whole life - and opened the utensil drawer to get a fork. no forks. i went to the dish rack. no forks. i looked in the sink. yup. there they are. all 20 forks. dirty. underneath the pile of plates and bowls and other casserole dishes and empty lunch storage containers.

the solution?

for a normal household: quickly do dishes. or, at least, grab a fork and wash it off.

for me: return to the utensil drawer. grab a spoon. use the spoon to eat casserole.

happy engagement, marshie!

it's one thing to blink and realize you've suddenly known someone for 7 years; it's another think of everything you've done with that person! i've literally watched that friends go through puberty, helped them with awkward dating situations (*cough*mandi*cough*), hated them, studied for high school exams with them, traveled halfway around the world with them, and watched two of them go on missions. somewhere in there, these three boys became like the three extra brothers that i never really wanted, but now i'm incredibly grateful to have them.

and now! this guy (equivalent to having a favorite brother in my world) is engaged!! obviously that deserves a whole blog post because, like i said, he's basically my favorite (but maybe i'm only saying that because the other two are in africa and the philippines) and i'm so excited for him that i bawled this morning when he texted me to tell me (but that could also be because i'm 6 months pregnant!). i'm so excited for him and carol, and for the incredible adventure that they're about to embark on! speaking from experience, being married is the funnest (maybe all that high school english wasn't as useful as i pretended it was).

it's been a great 7 years, and i can't wait to keep growing up and closer with marshall, and the other two boys once they're home (in a matter of months!).

Currently..

(Arianne started it!)

LISTENING.......... Carter's doing dishes, and there's a commercial on for Bounty Duratowel.

EATING.......... We just had French toast and bacon and hashbrowns and bacon and chocolate milk and bacon. I'm never eating again.

DRINKING.......... Nothing at the moment, but I'd like some more water.

WEARING.......... Sweatpants, moccasins, and one of Carter's shirts that still fits me.

FEELING.......... Sleeeeeeeepy. And I really want a powdered jelly-filled donut!

WEATHER.......... It was pretty nice today.. But I'm ready for spring.

WANTING.......... A powdered jelly-filled donut!

NEEDING.......... Sleep :)

THINKING.......... That baby Jack really likes bacon and chocolate milk.

ENJOYING.......... The fact that it's Carter's day to do dishes :)

Obligatory Love Post

Obviously tomorrow is Valentine's Day! And I don't know what Carter has planned - if anything - but I figured I may as well write my obligatory love post like I do every year!

2011 - I wrote two posts! One on what I did for him, and one on what he did for me! Note - I think we kept those hearts I trashed his house with, and some of them may or may not make a re-appearance this year! ;)

2012 - I actually didn't write any posts! I was too busy preparing to get married! But I do have some pictures. 

Carter surprised me with flowers, and with coming back to Edmonton from Slave Lake two days early!

Before he surprised me, we spend the evening at Boston Pizza eating heart-shaped pizzas!

Now. Love.

Brissa blogged beautifully about what love is. Read this post. That explains my life.

Love is waking my exhausted husband up at 2 in the morning because the baby is kicking and I know that husband wants to feel it.
Love is every night when husband remembers to fill up the humidifier so it keeps me sleeping, and helps me wake up with a clear nose.
Love is husband doing dishes while I soak in the bathtub.
Love is banging on the shower wall to get husband's attention, then asking him to grab me a new razor.
Love is asking husband to bring home Wendy's for me, even though dinner is already in the oven.
Love is never going to sleep angry, or without a kiss and 'I love you'.
Love is being married for a year, but feeling like it was only yesterday.

Love is me telling husband I want blonde hair and fake nails back and he says, 'K, make an appointment then!'
Love is always feeling spoiled, even when you have close to nothing.

Three years ago I was Nicole Martin, single, high school student, daughter, sister, friend.
Two years ago I was Nicole Martin, girlfriend of Carter Peterson, nanny, daughter, sister, friend.
One year ago I was Nicole Martin, fiance to Carter Peterson, student at NAIT, daughter, sister, friend.
Today I am Nicole Peterson, wife to Carter Peterson, mother-to-be, employee of DynaLife, daughter, sister, daughter-in-law, sister-in-law, friend.

So many things have changed. But love remains the same.